So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
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