I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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