she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
