Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
