he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
