i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
This baby is an asshole
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Randomize
