I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
