halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
