Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
it glows. i had to have it.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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