i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Randomize