I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
and you fell through a lawn chair
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Pooping to opera.
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