Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Randomize
