it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
