zippers are such a cool invention
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
I understand Curling. That high.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
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