just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
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