I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
I'm just crazy horny about you
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Randomize
