I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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