Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
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