I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
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