you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Randomize