So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
I'm sobbing to NWA
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Randomize
