I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
