Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
