Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Randomize
