Just fell off a train. Bad.
I smell stomach acid.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
You've changed since you got that strap on
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
