McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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