? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
