sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
