I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
