just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
