found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
Semen is not good for contacts.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
Randomize
