I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Randomize
