Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
I've blown a few things in my day
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
