I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
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