I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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