How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize