we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
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