It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
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