so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
there is puke in my bra ... again
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
