I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
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