how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Randomize
