I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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