you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
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