So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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