So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Randomize
