craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
