Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
How external is "for external use only"?
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
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