me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Randomize
