Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
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