I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
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